Torture as an alternate to the Death Penalty

Since Cheney and Mucusy (how *do* you spell his name?) think waterboarding is "just a dunk", and since harsh interrogation may be done against INNOCENT people, why not use this against suspected criminals? Surely an armed robber is more of a threat to personal security in my city than an impoverished jihadist thousands of miles away. Innocent fun with water!

My proposal:
Daily waterboarding for suspected criminals in most cases - no habeas corpus. If it is good for national security, it is good for local criminal law.

Do you want to die? Many people commit suicide "by cop". What if they thought they would be interrogated daily instead?

Convicted of First Degree Murder: Thirty-to-Life with twice daily waterboarding.
Convicted of Child Molestation: Life with hourly waterboarding and the other safe thing: tasering.
Convicted of Littering: Check in once a month for a mild ten minute waterboarding and twenty seconds of taser.
Run a Red Light or Stop Sign: fifteen seconds of tasering - on the spot - no need to waste tax payer money on courts.

This will be cost-efficient, saving our beloved Country millions (if not Billions!) of dollars. It will be a greater deterrent than the death penalty, the penalty of which can only - by definition - happen once. Crime rates will drop.

For those bleeding heart so-called "Christians" and others that believe in the Golden Rule - you should embrace this as it doesn't Kill outright - if someone dies, it was an accident! I swear!

My proposal is the kinder, gentler "Death Penalty Alternative with Benefits(c)" - it saves the Government precious tax dollars (your tax dollars are currently used to kill people), it doesn't kill (except for the accident, now and then, which would be understandable in the heat of the moment, no?), it will probably deter crime, and...if we do it to innocent people who are later proven innocent - hey, no "harm" done.